THE DOOR

 by Phillip Starr

There is a Japanese proverb that tell us,

“A man is judged by how he opens the door.

A woman is judged by how she shuts it.”

To grasp the meaning of this statement, it's first necessary to understand something of the architecture (and doors), as well as some of the customs of ancient Japan. Unlike the hinged doors of the West, Japanese doors slid back and forth along grooved wooden tracks on the floor. They were generally opened in the same way; you knelt at the crack of the door and gently pushed it open before entering the room (often done by sliding on the knees). Well-bred people knew the you use the hand nearest to door to open it a bit (“the length of a forefinger”, according to one old school of proper etiquette), then switch hands and open it the rest of the way. This is an extremely simplified explanation of how this is to be done. There are all kinds of manners to be observed in the simple action of entering a room in so far as the protocols of old Japan are concerned. During the feudal times, even an ordinary thing such as entering a room had significance and a certain order that evolved around it.

Such a simple act, when performed with the proper spirit and mental attitude could be seen as a type of kata and the meaning of the expression shown at the beginning of this article is to be found in that spirit and attitude. Look...it'd be pretty easy to make a flashy, macho entrance through a Japanese style door. You could sling it open so it whacks the frame, swagger in, and stand tall. But in an old Japanese home, people sat on the floor and as you swagger into the room, you'll tower over all of them. Yes, you'll be an imposing figure and have everone's attention. To many people, this would seem like a fine way to enter a room...so why does Japanese etiquette require the exact opposite?

The answer would be that many of the manners found in Japan are aimed at preserving social harmony. Getting along with the other fellow was important, as was the idea that the individual's welfare was not so significant as the welfare of the group. This way of thinking can be found in other cultures but in Japan, it was of paramount importance. The higher one sat in the social order, the more humble and self-effacing was his conduct. That is, the “classier” the individual, the less he felt that he needed to display himself. Secure in his social position, he didn't need to remind himself or others of his status. He entered the room quietly and shuffled in on his knees so that he maintained a level equal to that of others in the room. So, a man can be judged by how he enters a room...but why the distinction between men and women? Is it indicative of a different standard of manners between the sexes?

Well, yes. In old Japan, women were often in subordinate positions; if a group of men were in the room, it would likely be a woman who served tea and various foods. She would then leave, closing the door behind her. But the distinction made in the saying about gender is superfluous; what matters is the spirit and attitude with which an individual conducts him or her self.

This spirit and attitude has pervaded Japanese culture and as the martial arts (of Japan) are a product of that culture, it should come as no surprise that such concepts are an integral part of the martial ways. And that's also why it's so disappointing to see many people who claim to be serious about making the martial ways a part of their lives remain determinedly ignorant of this spirit and who (worse still) choose to disregard it. Such forms of etiquette also exist within the culture of China, although they're not so easy to see. But if you know what to look for, you'll see them there as well.

How many times have I seen some martial arts “master” come strutting onto the floor of a tournament usually with the title emblazoned on the back of his uniform) or the winning competitor prancing around the ring with his hands held high! If you've seen similar things, then you've been an unfortunate witness to the arrogant and ignorant disregard for the traditions in which the arts were developed. The skills of opening and closing a sliding door are a part of “reishiki” (etiquette) as is moving in a balanced, graceful way when sliding on one's knees along the floor and it's this mastery of the self that allows us to get along with others and present ourselves to the world in a respectful way.

Sadly, such things are disappearing in our modern world. People who are conversant with these traditions tend to be exponents of the classical arts, such as martial arts and the tea ceremony; people who are willing to spend time to learn things that seem to be of little practical, modern value. Although in present day Japan, you'd get along just fine without knowing much about these things but still, some manners (which have been called those “unwritten laws by which the people keep even the kings in awe”) have a way of transcending time and immediate circumstance. We are all judged by the little things we do...like entering or leaving a building. Those who follow the traditional martial ways are aware that outer form is often an expression of an inner state. This should give you something to consider the next time you open or close a door, whether you turn the knob, push it, or slide it along a track...